Merry Christmas

Ever wonder why Jesus died for you? I wonder often what he saw in me that was so redeeming that he would die on a cross to save me. Or maybe that was it. There was NOTHING redeeming in me. Nothing to save me from eternal damnation nothing to save me from myself. His love is so unconditional that it didn't matter how wretched i was or am to this day. He loves me enough to die a horrible death, so that i could spend eternity with him in heaven. It's such an amazing idea! I don't understand how anyone could do that! Why would God want to send his son for me? What pain would he and all the beings of heaven, go through seeing their prince, his only son, die. And with romans mocking him and asking why he couldn't just come down from the cross if he was so high and mighty. Therein lies the realization. He was dying so that they may live. that you may live. That I may live. He could have come off the cross at any time. He could have just killed those who chose to deny him. But he didn't. He continued loving them and us. Even those who were the cause of his death. Why? i don't know. His love is too strong and too great for me to comprehend. But i do know this: God loves all of us enough to send his only son to die for us. he doesn't want anyone to perish, but for all to live with him for eternity. And that is enough for me.
I love you guys!!! Merry Christmas!!!! :D

Drama:Faith

I hate drama! with a capital H-A-T-E!!!! but i think that sometimes it helps us grow. Like we don't realize it at the time but everytime we work through a difficult situation that seems nearly impossible we become stronger as a person. And we become better at problem-solving. I think, if the drama or whatever the problem is, gets solved and the people involved are still friends, that the people will become closer because of it.

It's kinda like our relationships with God. not the drama necessarily, but the questions. When we ask questions of God. We become closer to him because of them. I think that a lot of the time we feel like asking questions of God is wrong because he created the universe...who are we to question him? you know? But the truth is, if we keep them locked inside they're going to eat us from the inside out. We can't continue doubting God and wondering how things work and why things happen. It's better if we put our doubts and stuff out there. we can wrestle the issues with God and ourselves. Eventually, we will come to peace with whatever it may be and have stronger faith, and a better relationship with God because of it. I don't know what i'd do without God. But at this time in my life i'm feeling really distant from him. I know that's normal and i can deal with that. it just seems really inconvient with stuff that i'm dealing with right now. I know he's here though and i will continue to trust and live my life for him. I'd appreciate your prayers though. Thanks and i love you guys!!!!

so i'm a little late...but HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!!!!!!!!!!! :)
i'm thankful for oh so much!!! let me list it out...(i just made up that phrase, it doesn't make any sense at all but i don't care!!!!)

• Family
• Friends
• A house
• FOOD! :D
• Love
• Life
• Reese's (my fav)
• people i can lean on
• books (my connection to less complicated worlds)
• Computer
• Heat
• cars
• pencils!!!!
• technology
• Church
• YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

PS these are not written in order of improtance...and that's not all i'm thankful for, just a few things, i didn't want to bore you!!! :)

Hope you had a happy thanksgiving!!!!! and stuffed your bellies full! ;D

Amazing Love

Heya!!! i'm feeling soooo good!!!! The past...couple weeks, i think, i've been dealing with a lot. I love it when my friends know they can trust me. And there are multiple people who DO know that, and when they're dealing with stuff and they need someone to listen. I'm good at that...Listening...if there is nothing else to do for someone, at least give them the time of day and listen. My problem...or gain, whichever way you look at it, is that i tend to take on their problems as my own, i feel their pain, i see it in their eyes and know there is nothing i can do for them and i take it as an extra burden of my own. I've heard sooo many times that i just need to give it all up to God and let him take care of it...so if that's what you're thinking now, You're right and i realize that. I don't know why i think that i'm so independent, because if i were independent i'd be living on the street...or even dead. Because the truth is I am SO dependent on God! Every time I need help and even when i don't, i KNOW i can turn to God, in his word or in prayer, and he will always help me. And yet, when i have issues or i'm feeling my friends' pain, i try to deal with it on my own. Obviously i'm a slow learner, because this has happened soooo many times, and every time i come to the same conclusion: I can not deal with ANYTHING without God to lean on!!!!! I finally went to God in tears, i opened up my heart and said "i can't do this on my own, i need you're help! Take these burdens from me" so he did, and i woke up feeling 20lbs. ligther than i did the day before. It's at times like these that i wonder how anyone could deny that God is real! I really don't want to think about who i'd be without God or his amazing love. It makes me want soooo much more for my friends to have the satisfaction of knowing that God loves them. I pray that he will give me the oppurtunity to lead them to him.

I just want to say I'm Sorry to anyone who might have noticed me acting differently these past few weeks. Once again, i've been dealing with a lot, but i know that's no excuse...please forgive me!!!!

What if????

What would life be like if everyone bit there tongue when they were upset? What if, when someone said something cruel, we just held in our retorts and said something uplifting instead? What if we all saw that one person that was always alone, and instead of ignoring them we went to them and made a new friend? What if we loved everyone unconditionally, even our enemies? What if we went around with the intention of lifting ppl up higher than ourselves? What if our first thoughts in the morning was "How can i make Jesus proud" rather than "how can i make myself more comfortable"? What if we put others in front of ourselves? What if we longed for every second to honor God with our thoughts and actions? What if every person had God's compassion for the hurting? What if ppl cared about the hungry? What if we actually acted on the pull in our hearts towards the hurting? What if, on Christmas day, instead of sitting home and opening our gifts, we grasped the meaning of giving and actually gave to ppl who need it? What if we gave our excess food to the poor rather than getting fat on it? What if we forgave those who have hurt us as easily as we hold grudges? What if everyone cared about everyone else?

What then? Well, we would live in a perfect world, with no mistakes But also no chances to learn and grow. But everyday...do we strive to help others and live for God, or do we live for ourselves and strive to make ourselves more comfy and secure in our stuff? Every second of every day we need to live to it's fullest, with no regrets. There ARE people watching...they see how we love, how we respond to our enemies, how we respect or disrespect others. And what they see can either turn them to or away from God. When we're going about our daily lives we need to stop and think "who can i help right now?" and maybe we can make someones day a little better! :)

My song!

ok i've never done this before, but i'd like to share a song that i wrote with you all! i thought of it because i'm not exactly at a high point in my life as i'm sure you've gathered from my last couple of posts, but i have a lot of friends who are going through difficult stuff too, and not just the phsycological stuff i've been dealing with either. I have multiple friends whose parents are having issues, and i can tell it's really wearing them out. So this song was made with them in mind...and with the thought of how grateful i am that i have friends and that we can lean on eachother and help eachother through difficult times.

On a path that may go left, right, up, or down
Someone i love is always around.
To know that you care would be enough for me,
But no matter the mood,
You keep loving me!

So i want you to know,
Im not letting go!
Together we can make it out of here!

Today and tomorrow,
Through pain and the sorrow.
we'll do this together forever and ever!
I'll be here for you!
You'll be there for me!
we'll make it through
Just wait and see!!

In a world where the rumors fly 'round easily
the pain becomes less knowing that you trust me!
I see that your hurting it's plain in your eyes
I'll love you forever now here's your surprise...

Today and tomorrow,
Through pain and the sorrow.
we'll do this together forever and ever!
I'll be here for you!
You'll be there for me!
we'll make it through
Just wait and see!!

Love is patient, love is kind
it's not easily angered,
Love protects, trusts, and hopes,
love perseveres
No self-seeking, boasting, envy, pride,
but most of all...
LOVE NEVER FAILS!

Today and tomorrow
Through pain and the sorrow.
We'll do this together, forever and ever!
I'll be here for you.
You'll be here for me.
...
And together we can make it out of here!!!!!

So there you have it...comment and let me know what you think!!!! :)

Wishes

Wow! it's been a while!...i think i start all my blogs like that! LOL! sorry i haven't been very constant with my blogging! it's been super busy!

So anyways...I don't really know what's been going on with me lately. I've had soo many questions about things, i filled 5 pages in my journal of questions the other day! i don't even know what half of them were anymore i just know it took a long time to write down everything! i feel like i'm drifting from God but not intentionally (i'm getting this out there because i want you guys to let me know if you notice me acting differently!) I feel like i'm getting pulled into the whirl pool of junk in the world without actually doing anything wrong...at least i don't think im doing anything wrong. My heart longs to be so close to God, to do everything he wants me to, and to always be faithful. I know that's not possible because I'm human and everyone makes mistakes, it just is so hard when i see adults going around seeming like they never make mistakes and if they do they don't come out and say it, they just keep it to themselves or pretend it didn't happen (i'm not talking about anyone specific just in general, adults seem to be perfect and never make mistakes) I guess when i look to my role models, i wonder how they manage to go through a day that would put me in a bad mood and still be there for others and try to make their day better. I guess now i'm talking about DC. The other week he let us know he was having a bad day, but he still manages to be there for anyone who needs it and still tries to help them. I can see Jesus so clearly when i look at him and it amazes me! i long for that to be what others see when they look at me but i don't know if that's the impression given off or if i just look like a goody-two-shoes who is nice to the people that everyone else despises. I wish that i could see what others see in me. But all i can do is keep living everday for God and praying that others will see God through me. i'm so thankful that God has put such amazing people in my life because i don't even want to think where i'd be without the gentle nudge from my friends and family when im straying or the weekly talks with DC after Oasis (sorry, GSM) God is soooo good! I long to honor him but i so often feel as though i'm just taking away from the honor he deserves.

I want to get this out in case it can help someone else out there. I realized the other day that when i think of God i think of GOD who created the universe and does all these incredible miracles and cares about me but there's always someone ahead of me in line. I know that's not true. He is my FATHER! He loves me more than i could ever imagine and nothing i could do would make Him love me any less or any more! All that He does or doesn't do is for my benefit in the long run! He sees the whole picture and He will do what he knows is best for me! And He will never leave no matter how distant i may feel. It is not Him going away, but me! He is the father with His loving arms outstretched for His prodigal...daughter to run back into! And that is what i will do time and time again! I will run into His outstretched hands and cling tight to the one who will never leave me. I pray that is what we will all do...And we will live every second to it's greatest potential with no regrets!

Sincerely, Meg